Тексты песен «Tom Lehrer»

One week of every year is designated National Brotherhood Week. This is just one of many such weeks honoring various worthy causes. One of my favorites is National Make-fun-of-the-handicapped Week which Frank Fontaine...

Some of you who have small children may have perhaps been put in the embarrassing position of being unable to do your child's arithmetic homework because of the current revolution in mathematics teaching known as the...

It seems that most of the songs that you hear these days on the radio played by the disc-jockeys, apart from Rock-n-Roll and other childrens' records, tend to be motion-picture title-songs. Apparently producers feel...

I'd like to take you now on wings of song, as it were, and try and help you forget perhaps for a while your drab, wretched lives. Here's a song all about spring-time in general, and in particular, about one of the many...

Time was when an American about to go abroad would be warned by his friends or the guidebooks not to drink the water. But times have changed and now a foreigner coming to this country might be offered the following...

What with President Johnson practicing escalatio on the Vietnamese and then the Dominican crisis on top of that it has been a nervous year and people have begun to feel like a Christian scientist with appendicitis...

And now to the love song. I'm sure you're familiar with love songs on the order of He's Just My Bill, my man, my Joe, my Max, and so on where the girl who sings them tells you that, although the man she loves is...

Who can turn a can into a cane? Who can turn a pan into a pane? It's not too hard to see It's silent e Who can turn a cub into a cube? Who can turn a tub into a tube? It's elementary For silent e He took a pin and...

I do have a cause though. It is obscenity. I'm for it. Unfortunately the civil liberties types who are fighting this issue have to fight it owing to the nature of the laws as a matter of freedom of speech and stifling...

This year we've been celebrating the hundredth anniversary of the civil war and the fiftieth anniversary of the beginning of world war I and the twentieth anniversary of the end of world war ii L in all it's been a good...

This year we've been celebrating the hundredth anniversary of the Civil War and the fiftieth anniversary of the beginning of World War I and the twentieth anniversary of the end of World War II so all in all it's been a...

Strange Is the change They're trying to arrange Today in sociology Fanatics In their attics Are learning mathematics Just for sociology Persuasion By equation They all feel it's much more satisfactory They, in an...

We gather together to ask the lord's blessing For turkey and dressing and cranberry sauce. It was slightly distressing but now we're convalescing So sing praises to his name and forget not to floss. Our nearest and...

To the tune of "that's entertainment." Counting sheep When you're trying to sleep, Being fair When there's something to share, Being neat When you're folding a sheet, That's mathematics! When a ball...

To "there'll be some changes made". You take a function of x and you call it y, Take any x-nought that you care to try, You make a little change and call it delta x, The corresponding change in y is what you...

Now, if I may digress momentarily from the main stream of this evenings symposium, I'd like to sing a song which is completely pointless but which is something I picked up during my career as a scientist. This may prove...

One type of song that has come into increasing prominence in recent months is the folk-song of protest. You have to admire people who sing these songs. It takes a certain amount of courage to get up in a coffee-house or...

Almost every day during the hunting season you see at least one item in the newspapers about somebody who has shot somebody else, under the impression that he was a deer with a red hat perhaps, maybe a large...

Now I'd like to turn to the folk song, which has become in recent years the particularly fashionable form of idiocy among the self-styled intellectual. We find that people who deplore the level of current popular songs...

Another familiar type of lovesong is the passionate or firy variety, usually in tango tempo, in which the singer exhorts his partner to haunt him and taunt him and, if at all possible, to consume him with a kiss of...