Тексты песен «Weird Al»

Way back when I was just a little bitty boy living in a box under the Stairs in the corner of the basement of the house half a block down the Street from Jerry's Bait Shop... You know the place... Well anyway, Back then...

As I walk through the valley where I harvest my grain I take a look at my wife and realize she's very plain But that's just perfect for an Amish like me You know I shun fancy things like electricity At 4:30 in the...

Hit my snooze alarm for the 27th time Just don't feel like goin' to work - I think I'll call my boss, then I'm Gonna hack and cough and wheeze Swear I've got some strange disease What's that little twerp gonna say?...

Listenin' to the Muzak Hearin' people scream Sittin' in the waiting room Readin' crappy magazines With a toothache This is it, pal Root canal My molars are impacted I'm gettin' gum disease I'm gonna need some...

I was driving on the freeway in the fast lane With a rabid wolverine in my underwear When suddenly a guy behind me in the back seat Popped right up and cupped his hands across my eyes I guessed, "Is it Uncle Frank...

Risin' above the city, blocking out the noonday sun It dwarfs the mighty redwoods and it towers over everyone I still remember when that delivery truck came down our block What a lucky guy, I hear he got the last one in...

Sometimes I really want to be alone But that's one state I'm never in Because I know that I've got millions upon millions Of tiny, one-celled organisms living on my skin (Germs) I rub and scrub until my flesh is...

Who's that waddlin' down the street? It's just me, 'cause I love to eat Fudge and Twinkies and deviled ham Who's real flabby? Yes, I am! Every picture of me's Gotta be an aerial view Now my doctor tells me...

Gump sat alone on a bench in the park "My name is Forrest," he'd casually remark Waitin' for the bus with his hands in his pockets He just kept sayin' life is like a box of chocolates He's Gump, he's Gump What's in...

Say, do you remember that guy Larry next door Well, he always was the neighborhood clown Like the time he pulled my pants off And he took those color pictures And posted copies all over town Or the time that he...

You tell a joke and forget the punchline Why you always wastin' my time? Hey baby, trust me, you just disgust me Your hair's a mess and your make-up's crusty I don't know too many females Who make a habit of biting...

It's all about the Pentiums, baby Uhh, uh-huh, yeah Uhh, uh-huh, yeah It's all about the Pentiums, baby It's all about the Pentiums, baby It's all about the Pentiums! It's all about the Pentiums! (Yeah!!) What...

It's been one week since we got to see Cheatin' lovers and cousins that marry Five days since they had the show With the hermaphrodite, the slut and the crack ho Three days since we heard the tale About the guy who...

I recall the time they found those fossilized mosquitoes and before long they Were cloning DNA Now I'm being chased by some irate velociraptors Well believe me...This has been one losy day Jurassic Park is frightening...

La-la-la-la-la-lasagna You wanna some-a lasagna, magnifico Or-a maybe spaghetti Eh, you supper's a-ready, now where you go Mama-mia bambino Mama-mia bambino, sa matta you Sa matta you, sa matta you You shoulda taste my...

Oh, my baby, my baby she don't want me no more Ever since she saw his poster in that record store She says the way he grinds his molars is really sexy She thinks he's so darn dysfunctional and Generation X-y She...

Mom and dad are goin' out for the evening And you're stuck inside the house all alone That's when you decided it might be fun to harass someone Dial a random number up on your telephone You ask if their refrigerator...

["Wannabe" by Spice Girls] Yeah, well, I'll tell ya what I want, what I really really want (So tell us what ya want, what ya really really want) I'll tell ya what I want, what I really really want (So tell us what...

Vern zol fun dir a blintsa (How ya doin', Bernie?) Oy vey, oy vey! (How ya doin', Bernie?) Oy vey, oy vey! (How ya doin', Bernie?) Oy vey, oy vey! (How ya doin', Bernie?) Oy vey, oy vey! And all the goyim say I'm...

Since you've been gone Well, I feel like I've been chewing on tinfoil Since you've been gone It's like I got a great big mouthful of cod liver oil Oh well, I'm feelin' like I stuck my hand Inside a blender and...